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Looking back to the past to help transform the future is a significant part of the recovery process. While those who have been through a recovery program may have internalized the detrimental effects that their drinking may have had on their lives, looking back can also cause someone to romanticize drinking. Culture and advertisements can all play a part in someone beginning to change their views on drinking, even after maintaining their sobriety for a long time. However, addiction is a lifelong disease, and romanticizing alcohol can compromise much of the work that someone has accomplished. Identifying how someone can start romanticizing their time with the alcohol and how to remind someone of the dangers it presents can aid in each person’s continuous battle in their recovery.
Romanticizing Can Set in Quickly
There can be any number of reasons that someone can begin to romanticize their time with alcohol. Going to the bar to blow off steam and constant advertisements tying alcohol’s use to happy, social gatherings, there can be many ways to receive mixed signals about drinking, even after they have experienced the highly destructive side of alcohol. Even video games, where players are asked to engage with alcohol to complete quests for rewards, can portray alcohol as beneficial, such as in games like The Elder Scrolls 5 - Skyrim or Red Dead Redemption 2. Receiving these signals can begin to alter how someone may see their history with alcohol and may have them think back to gatherings that used to involve alcohol. Watching the Super Bowl with friends or having Saturday night poker nights can all become romanticizations if these messages go unchallenged in one’s mind. It can also send messages that someone may have developed an addiction because they couldn’t control themselves, not that the drink was inherently the problem. However, such thoughts can be dangerous and can compromise the healthy lifestyle and sobriety that someone had worked so hard to achieve.
Combating Romanticized Thoughts
Recognizing that someone may be starting to romanticize their time with alcohol can be challenging to spot, and support systems may realize the change in thoughts before the person in recovery does. Signs that someone may be experiencing turmoil around their recovery and continued sobriety may include beginning to talk more fondly of old past times, negative or neutral words used to describe alcohol, or even beginning to make jokes about drinking or being drunk. During these times, it is crucial to take a step back and remind oneself of why they started recovery in the first place. Reminding oneself of their personal goals, or even writing them down, can help remind someone of the bigger picture surrounding their recovery.
Let the Tape Play Out
Letting the tape play out means that even while someone may be romanticizing poker nights again, that it is essential to think of these romanticized events in more than just a few moments in time. It involves looking at the next morning and addressing how they felt both physically and emotionally. It consists of looking at the rest of the week and asking if drinking had helped them on a professional front or was more of a detriment. It involves taking this single, romanticized moment in time and establishing context, including how it may set a dangerous precedent for oneself. Even if it seems like a single image or time causing someone to romanticize their past, addiction and recovery have many interconnected factors frequently at play.
Creating Sober Memories
Memories created in sobriety can also add much-needed context romanticization. Eliminating alcohol from the picture and still creating positive memories, either by professional advancements, personal achievements or even having a genuinely happy day, it is possible to understand its impact on one’s life better. Despite how often that alcohol is portrayed as the key to a great social gathering, it is just as possible to see that someone can host a Super Bowl party without alcohol and still experience the same levels of excitement.
Having a list of romanticized moments of drinking is often dwarfed by sober accomplishments, which are a powerful tool in reminding oneself of the real effects of alcohol. Recovery is about the bigger picture, not just one moment in time. It is about establishing healthy practices to create a sober, successful lifestyle where someone isn’t hindered by themselves and instead, expresses themselves genuinely and productively.
There can be any number of stressors that can cause someone to be tempted into re-engaging with past destructive behaviors. To help maintain recovery it is important to recognize romanticizing thoughts can set in quickly and there are ways to combat them. Playing the tape out and creating sober memories are effective in combating romanticization. If you or a loved one are struggling with maintaining your sobriety or are simply looking to continue to develop your coping strategies and identity, START UP RECOVERY can help you take the next step towards your goals. Your stay with us can be personalized to fit your own needs and goals, while the luxurious atmosphere of support and community can work with you to understand your vulnerabilities. By taking a break and looking at your stressors, as well as reconnecting with a powerful, professional support system, START UP can help you regain your footing through difficult parts of maintaining your sobriety. For more information on how we can help you or to talk to a caring, trained staff member about your situation, call us today at (310) 773-3809.